Just a little about the person you’re going to be reading about…
Some people know me, some people don’t, but nobody knows everything about me. I have a rough exterior (sort of), I hide my anger, sadness and worry with a smile, and most of the time my heart feels like it is literally hurting. My eyes continuously fill up with tears, which most of the time are incredibly hard to fight back. I could be working and just start thinking of something out of the blue and like a cascading waterfall, I feel them pouring down my cheeks. Someday I have to write Maybelline and thank them for waterproof eyeliner and mascara.
I’ve been through so much in my time on this planet. I feel like I’m never going to catch a break. As soon a I think I am, there’s a roadblock, and then a dead-end street. The sun will start to rise, and then a storm will blow in. Hopefully this will give you a little glimpse of the way I feel. Don’t get me wrong, I have many up days, I really do. But the majority of my life has had so many twists and turns, I just never feel like there will be an upswing. I don’t talk about this to anyone in real life anymore because when I did, they stopped talking to me and thought I just wanted to be left alone – figured I was strong, I’ve made it through so much. I tell you now that I’m not that strong, I’m hanging on by a thread, and if I don’t continue to write down how I feel, I’m just going to become weaker and weaker.
Do your strong friends a favor and check on them. They need you more than you think they do.